After listening to Marcia speak tonight, I learned how to express my biggest fear: having to face someone that can't handle my fears. I am afraid of being at that point of a frightened child and facing someone looking at me with the face that they can't handle it. I think that's why I took abuse my whole life. And even in the face of this, you have to be enlightened and a hero with our fears. There aren't always people there to take comfort in them for you. With having a frightened spot inside of me that no one can reach but me from being left physically hurt in my brain as a toddler, I would accept much less for me. I accepted friends that didn't like me, boyfriends, people to laugh at me instead of with me for love-toward my gifts and dreams, to not feel so alone as a way to fit in, And all along, I couldn't identify or figure out how to get away. When the worst of the physical impacts hit me, I found I couldn't breathe by trying to be compliant to this same lifestyle. And I got tired from running from this. As we all face our fears and our uniqueness, we learn how to communicate these to others that will appreciate these special character traits of us. We may find someone who loves these things of us. We can find strength and learn how to market ourselves to make money from these special gifts.
Even though we really do have to learn to love, forgive, and give with these gifts, it is still good to write a list of what your fears and pains are. That way you can learn how to share them in the world and be happy. Here are a few of mine to help you get started:
1. I thought life had to be planned.
2. I felt if I didn't see how my dream was supposed to happen that I was a failure.
3. I didn't understand what my uniqueness was from this.
4. I could not communicate everything I was feeling as I was growing up.
5. I lived around my own thoughts in my mind that were so quiet.
6. I didn't know my own thoughts or mind.
This is just a start. Write yours down and figure out how they can fit into your dreams of the true, real you!